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YPS. 2L'09. DHSSB clarinets. Math Society. 21101995. math is everything. sleep and eat! :B
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Wants
{♥} 3.8 GPA
{♥} A for LA
{♥} A+ for math
{♥} P+S earrings
{♥} netball match
{♥} xxlc outing
{♥} see RI band concert
{♥} see SSO concert
{♥} play yetpeng's eupho with her mouthpiece
{♥} I♥MY CAR slippers
{♥} take aimless walk with friends
{♥} zoo
{♥} escape theme park
{♥} take random buses from int to int
Saturday, March 26, 2011, 11:27:00 PM
Cross Fingers
Crossing Fingers that few people visit this blog :ONowadays, things start to change, i dont even know whether i should do anything about it, or just them go through my fingers.
I wanna have 3 days of continuous sleep!! ):
the feeling came back out of the sudden.
i actually feel happy when i did that, omg. im such a stupid person ._.
waiting and waiting, for you to say a hi, and thats why i went online. but no! you didnt say hi to me. ._.
Thursday, January 06, 2011, 9:54:00 PM
wow
In the span of 3 weeks, I am feeling that I going to have a BIG crush on you. Immature one, but yup. You're very nice and everything, yet I know this is just a crush! There's a big difference between crush & liking a person.Been liking someone for close to 3 years, and the feeling I get when I see you is always the same, it's expressionless.
Thursday, October 28, 2010, 11:11:00 PM
feel
we have our own friends, our own clique, our own listening ears. we actually don't need each other anymore. we might need each other in the past, but no longer. others need me more & the blind woman (me) tdy then realised how much effort i need to put in to repay them. all of them. time to adapt to the life without a once great friend like you. Cos there's no point to hold it anymore~Saturday, October 23, 2010, 11:06:00 PM
treasure
friend, i will ignore you from this day on. till you understand or realised the importance of me in your heart. and if im worth nothing to you, lets just be friends, and not what "best" friends. i find no point, calling each other best friends. when in actual fact, we are afraid to say we are in front of others. where you mind so much about what others say. and we dont even know each other well. no loss/gain for me. just that i can get rid of the troubles i've been having cos of you.Tuesday, September 21, 2010, 12:27:00 AM
knot
you're the knot in my heart. you are nothing more than anyone else. however, we never know how to really make each other happy. though we are good friends. we know that we are good friends, yet we are never happy when we are together as friends. i will never know the true reason behind all these, cos everytime when i try to understand whats going on, it just end up pulling the knot tighter, making my heart break further. it might sound like you're a guy and im in love w you or smth. but it is never the case. i just wish that we can like before. like how i am with other good friends. i always wanted to be myself in front of you but somehow something is stopping me and i have no idea. i get jealous over people who can make you so happy, you too. but whats the problem that we cant seem to solve? i have been constantly thinking about this problem, yet i know you dont really give a damn because it just brings you hurt.but i really want to tell you, that i truly care about this friendship, though it is always so on-off.
Tuesday, August 17, 2010, 11:05:00 PM
cheerful
okay :D shall be high and happy :)im really tired now though! just spent 1 hour reading my year 1 blogposts haha. very positive and happy and i shall be happy and positive too :)
today geog test in the morning! i was a bit stone but i did my best!! but i write rather little. i dont know how to crap opps. and the scariest thing happened.
CLARINET PLAYINGGG!! wah, my mind went blank for at least 3 min because i heard clarinet playing. i very sensitive to clarinet sound. i just will stop and think of who is it then i cant concentrate le. that time phys practical also.
yong is playing clarinet in preparation for his clarinet exam! all the best to my wonderful senior :) the crazy crazy clarinet senior haha! :)
math is rather crazy.. the graph thing. i really like gonggong lost in math le. haha. but new topic quite cool :) pascal triangle! remember spamming for math trail last year. do till siao!!! i was the one who did it (not that i came up w solution. is i do the chu1 huo2, people think of solution ^^) most carefully.. the number was very very big :O
pascal in binomial very cool :) haha :) hope it wont get crazy crazy in the later part :O
geog was okay. i was paying attention at first de!! then suddenly switch off and dozing off liaoz :S ps la! i always like dozing mood de :S
LA was test T.T hope dont fail or anything!!
HCL LOL LOL LOL. chinese teacher talk about xiao shuo. then she spend like 20min telling us a random story that i like half asleep. didnt manage to catch the ending :O the story so confusing and rather weird weird de.
the liao zhai everyone must be very awake. cool mahh, movie eh! but so funny when teacher want to close it and end lesson when come to fighting, but we were damn interested in watching the movie. better than looking spam of chinese words on the ppt. nevertheless, xiao shuo is really cool actually :)
then chem prac!! i like blurblur. then look here and there. and looking at other people in action no help at all. then i just tikam. heng i redo my first test and got the litmus paper red == then i thought got smelly smelly lah! but in the end cos acidic gas. then cant be sulfur dioxide too random de gas. then i put carbon dioxide in the end!
phew, all the cation and anions correct. check w the pro imba iris. wont wrong de! but is my observations that suck lah! lol! i anyhow crap. how can i write some observations just for pouring distilled water into the test tube containing M. nothing leh ==
phys i totally lost cos i missed the first few lessons on dynamics. but i just read the slides. sort of get it le. YAY! :)
haha happy now :)
im crazy for band yeah. but im not caring anymore. i love band (:
i dont care, i think that la forza del destino and gran finale super hard!!! D: but i will man man lai and be patient w myself :) i know i can do it someday :)
and for weber. can de lah! man man lai :)
slowly can get it de !! :) go clarinet :)
math soc tmr! hope wont die w the random math spam stuff :)
Monday, August 09, 2010, 12:05:00 AM
band chalet :)
after this band chalet, i have a very clear idea who im voting for band chairperson :) whooo to that person :) you rocks lah :) thanks for everything!Tuesday, July 27, 2010, 11:37:00 PM
Reflection
When you look into yourself in the mirror,
are you still yourself?
Are you still the one who cried when it's the last day of graduation in primary school?
Are you still the same?
Do you still like the same colour? Do you still like the same crush since primary school?
Do you?
Or have you changed?
A lot of people are thinking about this issue.
However, only one question is important
Do you like the way you are now?
Do others like the way you are now?
Everyone change, they adapt to surroundings. This is science. How our minds work when others talk about their views on us, how our brains absorb their opinions and hope to change into the person they would prefer perhaps?
Everyone change.
Some to the better:
More confident in themselves
More hardworking
More mature
More sensitive to words
Cheerful
Some to the dark side:
Low self esteem
Depression
Attract attention
Lonely
Proud
Rude
We all know that we are changing. However we can't stop that from continuing. All we can do it either let it be and continue to change to the better/worse. We know whether we are getting better or worse. When we are getting worse, do we ever stop ourselves? Or isit that we can't be bothered?
Ask Yourself
One day, when you regretted changing so much. So much that others couldnt recognise you anymore. What should you do? Can you turn into the person you once was?
Answer is: No
You wont be able to remember who you are anymore. It is hard to turn back when everything has settled.
Sometimes, you will notice others emphasizing some characteristics, telling you that you've changed. Why did they say that? If it was for the better, they will be praising you. And not just say "you've changed"
Or isit that you changed without noticing it at all? Time to think and reflect. Perhaps you are heading to the wrong direction without knowing.
I hope no one end up regretting their choice. You made the choice to change.
Another scenario,
Reflect
Have your friends changed?
Do you even truly know the answer?
Have they turned more and more distant from you?
Have they turned into a person you no longer recognise?
Have they..
No longer regard you as the way they did in the past?
I have the experience. And I am still experiencing it now. My friends are changing. Perhaps at times i just couldnt be bothered due to my hectic schedule, and so are their schedules.
When everything ends, we realized, we can't communicate like before. Perhaps it is gradually. When everything just falls in place. Yes, we cant communicate like before. We can't laugh laugh smile smile play play like before.
I wish we could. I wish I've shown more attention to you
I wish..
I think i should stop reflecting LOL
Shall go revise petit test!! particle passe o.o
Tuesday, July 20, 2010, 12:07:00 AM
love
there's a lot of people i wish to care. but im afraid to care cos im not close to them, and some they dont even know me well..today i saw you, feeling so insecure. i wish i have more time to calm you down..
today your senior talked about you. i want to help you. but idk who are you LOL
i wish i can have the time to care and people wont freak out cos i care for them. isnt it niec to have people to care about you actually ? :)
share the love, spead the love :)
Sunday, July 18, 2010, 3:21:00 PM
determination
wonder if i can survive this week smoothly..life is really different when you have another responsibility.. i want to fall in also cannot ._. there's so much to do, to change. i want to be the old me. but i know i need to face my responsibility.
i have been very late nowadays, in terms of meeting with teachers, friends, CCA, assignments. everything. everything seem to go one pace faster than my normal pace. i cant seem to catch up.
i have a wonderful day yesterday, with my good friends like venus and patricia. piano with my teacher, playing bucanneer like mad.
there's Macbeth plot quiz tmr, i dont know if i will survive it through.. SMP report due on friday.. ACE essay due next next week (i have no idea what to write for it).. chinese memorize thing..
the thing i worry about most is SMP. the papers that Dr Lua gave, i always only understand 10% of the whole thing. i really need his guidance through. this is already the last week of the project. and i am still reading the papers. and this time is a NEW one.
out of the group members, i was supposedly the one better in math. i got spammed with math stuff. technically it seems to be a science mentorship programme, however our project is based on computer science and requires logic the MOST out of other sciences. perhaps excluding physics. im already going bonkers with the routing. hashing.
the papers i am reading now is 16 pages long. it is not like some fiction book. fiction books at least i know the gist of it. this paper. is totally. ._. for me..
i know i havent been doing alot for the SMP and rongying did most of the work. but i really dont want to face any more computing math thing!! why cant we just learn binary numbers for computer science instead? o.o why have mod, log, surds, indices =.=
ahhhhh!!
jiayou yps. jiayou jiayou
Sunday, July 11, 2010, 11:06:00 AM
wheeeee (:
http://ypssss-kid.blogspot.com/ :D:DWednesday, July 07, 2010, 11:15:00 PM
thank you!
really touched today. today rocks :)irene jianchong makou: thanks for everything! sorry for flaring up at times! especially to makou ._. but im glad our boat manage to GO FAST (WHOOWHOO!!!) and we didnt feel that zibei.
we lost not cos we are not good. perhaps we can be headstrong and say. the race is unfair. only one timer with one stopwatch and there's human reaction time error. 0.06s is REALLY LITTLE.
but i love our boat! and our dear mascot! i really had fun with the seniors too :) especially the girls :) the guys were rather sehseh kind. with only that idk who kept asking some guy to do some weird thing LOL!!
we all see the weak and bad side of each other. how makou just complains, everyone do.. how jianchong heck care about his injury.. how irene so determined in her designs.. hahaha. AND MOI. THE FUTURE PRO FISH CATCHER!! :)
i catch a lot of fish de kay :D want fish? find moi. give me a bottle that already being cut. haha and i catch for you to see and i let them go back to the pond :) I not that pro, i only know how to catch small fishes :)
WHEEEEE :) MIA!! :) i love to see it CUT the water SO SO PRETTTYYYYYY!!
MEIJI, you rock man
11:09:00 PM
watch out!
this issue is regarding my best friend:recently, i found out that my best friend has been continuously "harassed" by little kiddos. o.o you all better dont bully my best friend and please give up if you want to get my best friend from me. cos it will NEVER EVER WORKS.
you and my best friend are just salt in water. taste salt, feels that salt is still salt in water. you feel that you and best friend very close. but no! salt dissociate in water to sodium and chloride ions. not related at all. you just stick together by the FORCE. my best friend is forced to be "close"
my best friend and i is just like water. we have strong covalent bond. though rather low melting and boiling point, we are ALWAYS strongly stick together, super super close together. in all states, we are always together.
so no one is capable of snatching my best friend away from me, unless is same age as me, so same maturity. im super selfish im sorry. especially dealing with kiddos.
want fight for my best friend, try me man.
lol, this is just plain jealousy
Thursday, June 24, 2010, 10:19:00 PM
roar
im feeling very helpless. pissed. angry. all the negative stuff. want to break down. want to sleep. idk what should i do actually.*with a spark of hope i guess.
off to another place to think about it more.
Sunday, June 13, 2010, 9:36:00 PM
300th post
wheeee. reached 300th post.holidays have passed. half of it.
everyday, i learn new things. this holidays i learnt a lot. i cant believe i took up computing science project without serious thoughts and i was stuck in com lab for 9 hours for 3 days, staring at visual basic. Im glad that we managed to achieve something at the end of it, though it is just the beginning of our protocol.
i make new friends, i saw the other side of my friends. they are very beautiful :)
bad things happened to me too, and im glad that i have my dearest friends to comfort me :) thanks !!! :)
funny things happened too, and bonded myself with my friends, esp the ones that im arent that close to.
Realised some life lessons learnt.
Im eager for band camp!!!!
totally dreading school reopen, i will be back into the enclosed classroom, with homework due. IDMI O.O
Saturday, June 05, 2010, 5:58:00 PM
happy life(:
Finally, first week of june hols is over(:Alot of things happened, things that inspired me, things that made me disappointed, sad, things that made me afraid
MSO is finally over(: though the math part was not perfect and well done, everyone, especially the planning committee learnt something from it, which is better than having a success. Here wishing the next year Math Society Committee to do a better job than us!(:
I had fun with Thiri "mugging" though most of time we were crapping about stuff that we both love to discuss. I managed to finish my physic quiz and math homework with her. Thiri did chemistry quiz, biology worksheet and chemistry worksheet.
Thursday with Yet Peng was nice(: I have not seen her for a year plus. I really missed the times in OLN, where we are carefree and we don't worry for CTs, grades as fun is more important than grades. I did embarassing things in front of her, especially in the canteen.
The kids were not very nice. However, they are very cute! They are childish and innocent. They "horhor"-ed me when i said "shit" and claimed it's vulgar. Thinking at my back of my head, in Dunman High, shit is just a normal word, even the f word is said out without people stopping. (I don't mean I say f word)
The kids always quarrel! They are a bit hot tempered too. I tried my best to teach them stuff, but they don't understand my language. In the end, due to my carelessness, I taught them the wrong stuff. I'm so sorry. I think they hate me for that now.
Well, I met Miss Susan Koh on monday afternoon (: I was doing my homework at the void deck where 5joyians painted our school flower there. I can still remember it vividly that it was pouring that day, and 5Joyians bonded under the rain. I miss OLN!): I managed to talk Miss Koh into giving me 杨老师's number. (: I will call her someday (:
Yesterday was great day (: In the morning, I meet up with my close friend to pass him his homework. Then we went to the void deck and do homework again (: left him at hougang mall and I went mountbatten MRT to find Patricia! I'm sorry I was late!
The ban mian stall wasn't open ):
In the end, we ate chicken rice. Then, we went to school. Band! (:
I forgot what we do. Opps. I remember we slacked abit. I talked about a lot of things to Patricia. I bet she must be tired of me! After that, Poh, Patricia and me started playing random stuff like otto langee(?). Then Bryan joined in to play the Beethoven Trio (: which in the end turned out rather boring.
Then everyone came and we practised Sheba. Rather nice (: I'm sorry for being so sharp that day! Barrel was almost 0.5cm out.
French horn's ensemble was cute(: We had fun watching Bryan Chia dancing to Bad Romance. LOLS
Then blah blah, fast forward.
The dinner wasn't great. We shouldn't even played because the audience paid no attention to us. They should just let them have a nice dinner and the people eating won't need to be aware when the music stop (without appreciating it) and just clap for 3 seconds.
Most importantly, It's over (:
Today I slacked my day off! I kept sleeping, sleeping and sleeping. Opps.
I'm going to eat fruits now (: CYA! :D
I love myself :D
Oh! Forgot to type:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO:
Phebe: 1st June
Janice Meng: 2nd June
Cassandra: 3rd June
(:
Tuesday, June 01, 2010, 9:56:00 PM
evil!
i did a very bad thing today to someone. but NO WAY im saying sorry. really feel like suaning you with a lot of stuff. you kept saying you will do this and that. saying like you are THAT pro to complete. yet you did nothing and even screw yourself. and all you do was sad emo. people gave you advice and all you did was nothing. thinking it's okay.you did a very bad job did you know that. you think you're good already. but if your goal is not achieved, everything is nothing.
not trying to criticize you or what. wake up kid. stop being in your own world and thinking that is people who changed you. you are the one allowing them to change you. you cant be emo-ing about the friends you mix with. do something to it.
do something. stop typing and ranting non stop. your hands arent for typing only. ACTION. please stop dwelling and dwelling.
dwelling only show immatureness. comeon, you are 15.
realised saying nice words dont help you at all. motivate motivate. yes you are motivated. but do you really put in your best to stuff? what do you end up doin?
slacking
for years, since i met you. slacking. then you regret. then you slack again. then say what IM DETERMINED TO GET 3.8! what crap is this. determined? for 2 years you get nothing near it.
hope this make you cry or something. make you be awake from your IMMATURE actions. you think you are very mature. you think you know what you are doing. but you arent.
and im not stating that im mature.
im just very very very very disappointed and very angry with your words and actions.
do more than say PLEASE.
this might be my 气话. but 80% of it i mean it.
if talk nice doesnt work, i shant talk nice. scold you like crap better.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010, 6:58:00 PM
june hols
homework for june hols: o.o!1. zuo wen (hua yang nian hua)
2. chinese test papers
3. chemistry test papers
4. geography worksheet
5. geography pyramid question
6. chinese project
7. IDMI filming
8. SMP course/ report
9. storyboard(?)
10. physics worksheet
11. physics quiz
12. chemistry online quiz
13. e-learning on chemistry particulate nature of matters
14. chemistry structured worksheet
15. chemistry file
16. biology concept map
17. biology assignment
18. biology ten years series
19. biology textbook read up
20. ACE IDK WHAT
21. ACE IDK WHAT
oh no. ace what homework :S
Sunday, May 16, 2010, 2:04:00 PM
14may is meaningful
wheee! :) nice day! 14may (: well, quite some things happenedwe found the 4th member for our physics thing! welcome irene :D
won 3H in bball, yet lost to 3J :S
follow my dear senior footsteps :D
most meaningful - picking up litter
well, julia, patricia and me were very WOWed by the actions of some senior (who always think im a freak). that senior picked up litter and enjoyed it.
apparently, the dustbin beside drink stall (both 2 of them) were spammed with rubbish. then one girl carefully throw the rubbish and everything dropped. i felt bad and i stared at her :S she knows i stare at her. cos she didnt do anything about it.
then julia say lets pick them up. then i was okay :D hahaha.
dirtied my hands, clean my heart. lol. at times when i see litter on the floor, i treat it i didnt see anything. most of the people do that.
but picking them up the feeling is very nice :) haha
felt happy after picking up the litter, spend around 10min lol!
took 158 home with spammage of things to carry. one of the worst day ever with SO MANY stuffs (heavy) to bring home. not that i mugger or what. is just mainly, im very disorganised and have a big file. and i have yearbook to bring home. then band file etc... and spam of tshirts i brought today.
saturday:
next day, i woke up with muscles pain on shoulder, wrists. :S quite okay bah! then prac piano go piano. talkeed to my teacher student's mum about dhs. have to say the truth that dhs is so stressful when year 3 everyone just realised the importance of studying and most people forget whats friendship and turn materialistic.
then went for quintet. quite fail with mr teo abotu opening the bandroom :S then prac. gossiped. blah.
ate with patricia and huiyi
then went CS concert. very nice :)
now slacking. need do work le! SMP! ^^ distributed hash table . ._. identifier.
i forgot most of things. when im the one who understand most of them. then all the questions i need to answer. troubles :S
Wednesday, May 12, 2010, 9:05:00 PM
life ^^
*FLASH BIGBIG SMILE* :)im feeling really happy nowadays, after all those bad days that were filled with insults by people. well, i do enjoy life. i will always belong to the BRIGHT side, no matter how dark others are, and how evil they are towards me :)
lets zoom out from all the bad things that happen to us :D and ZOOM IN to the ones we enjoyed so much :)
sometimes, is just so childish and funny when i can get so happy by looking at JJ, listening to ____ music, listening to the songs that someone once send, when i look at digimon, burning greymon, remembering the times i spend with great friends last year :)
photos really tell alot. glanced back at random scenery pics i once take the past 2 years. wow, i didnt know i went through so much. DHS really arranged so many things for us. thats why reflections come in, for we to refer, to remember what we've done and the happy times we had. well , i didnt write reflections, i only stare at the photos, saw my big smiles with my friends. "yes, i had a great time" thats what i thought.
though at times, there are photos where we strain to give a smile, a very very fake smile. but still. :)
im feeling very great now. though life isnt as smooth as before.
haha, PC today WAS FUN. hahahahahaha! so lame with rebecca, sitting at the last seat, thinking that _____ will sit beside me. lol. obviously that person didnt. if not me and rebecca will laugh like idk what ^^ a lot of people slept through the lecture, i was half falling asleep. well the quotes are good, but i didnt have enough time to digest it then she went on to the next. i spend quite some time finding random people, hahaha ss was SLEEPING :o as usual!! lol!! hahahaha!! typical. ^^ i was high at last few moments of her talk. lol.
then mr koh (WHOOO!) story came in. everyone were so engaged. i was thinking, is mdm leer hurt? :( im sorry! he is SO INTERESTING AND FUNNY. his story is VERY meaningful!! awwwwww. his brother plays the euphonium!! he had such good ties with his brother :) i wish me and my sister can be closer!! i shall learn from her too :) we are very different. :(
well, got back LA, geog, chinese and biology grades. im glad that my LA is A :) im not happy my geog is A :( first time my geog is A!! (er maybe not, last year CA3 my geog was A too) wahhh, but i know i will improve. got B for chinese :( hahahaa. the person sitting beside me get A+. there is no peer pressure that make me improve my chinese, though im sitting beside a PRC ._.
really need to buck up on my languages!! yong is right, we are not bad in languages, is because we didnt care and neglect our language, and focus too much time on math and sciences. well, i love math and sciences :)
hope my phys is A+ xD then i get rather high GPA :)
but not as high as laoqians like iris, darien, kaixiang, makou, qingyang. which i think 90% getting 4.0GPA!!! WAHHHHHH!!! imba!
i went to steal scores yesterday. hahaha. well, in the end the score no nice melody to play. so i put back. instead i found SL report (trumpet), and the ensemble score (second half) i was looking for since a long time ago!! however, im still lack of one page. -.-
im looking forward to JUNE HOLS :D i want to go out with my friends :) devote my time into SMP, IDMI (uhhh.), band!
i know there will be times when im forced to do the things i dont like. but i know it is for the thing i like that im sacrificing so much. good things need hard work, well i shall just bear with it and look at it WITH POSITIVE MINDSET :)
i want go back oln with yp :) haha go teach BRASS band LOL! wonders what i will be teaching when i know ZERO brass stuffs! o.o i can teach them how to train GOOD TONE :) and thats all. errrr. yp shall teach me how to buzz. some brass players tried to teach me how to buzz before. but fail xD hahahaa! jia ying's one is the WORST xD hehe.
okay i need to chiong LA and SMP le :) hahaha!
im looking forward to level camp! cos i want to play AFTER the day camp, at night :D whoooo :)
i suddenly realised, i have too much, so much to enjoy. yet i expect too much from just one source. other sources are so much better. time to let go my wishes. i love you friends :D
i kept running away, im afraid. i try my best to tell myself to be fearless. but something just stop me. the things that happened in the past :S
i wanna watch Labyrinth again!! :)
`as the world falls down!